yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
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