It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
