Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
