To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Randomize
