i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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