Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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