I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
My day in three words: secret purse cake
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I'm both gender and math confused
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
