...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
