Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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