Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
17 year olds will be the death of me.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
