ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize