Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
