Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
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