it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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