He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize