and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Randomize
