Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
