The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Randomize
