I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
