What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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