The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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