he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
