Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
