But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I licked your asshole in confidence.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Randomize