Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize