Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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