this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
