i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Drake has all the answers
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
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