Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I love you.
Bad choice
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
