I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
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