I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
