If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
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