I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
He has the fingertips of a God
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