My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Randomize
