whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Randomize
