he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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