i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
