Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
