why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Randomize
