What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
