what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I stole a fireplace last night.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
