You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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