You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
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