He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Randomize
