He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
