great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Shame - the story of my life.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize