I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
