it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize