Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Randomize