went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize
