just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize
