butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
my liver is dry heaving
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
